Tag Archives: God

A little inspiration

From time to time I need a little inspiration. I find it in many places, but often watching inspirational YouTube videos encourages me to stay on track and keep the faith. Here’s one for the single ladies that I enjoy watching. I find it inspirational because I can relate to what Erica says especially with her being 38 at the time and going through clinging to relationships that should be cut off. I can also relate to the discontinuity in a relationship, the roller coaster relationship experience, the constant crying, sadness and absence of peace or trust. Some of these feelings are my issue but I also have to accept that part of the them may be God telling me that the man I was with wasn’t the one, no matter how much I want him to be. I’ve been in a place of knowing I should let go intellectually but my heart viciously rebels, in fact I’m there now! It hurts like heck and is extremely and utterly confusing, but we all know that God is not the author of confusion. So, what’s a girl to do when she wants nothing more than to be with the counterfeit or someone she isn’t sure about? The answer is simple but so very difficult and is always to listen to and give it to God and make the choice to follow His guidance, no matter how much it hurts.

Erika shares a wonderful and uplifting testimony (she also has an awesome pregnancy testimony) for anyone that wants to be a Godly wife to a Godly husband but is afraid of letting go of a current ‘situation’. Although all of our stories will be different, I pray that we all have wonderful testimonies to share with others in the upcoming chapters of our lives!

God bless & here’s to a purposeFULL life!
Court😉

Part one:

 

Part two:

 

 

How I know He loves me

Happy Valentines day!!!  I love holidays and V-Day is no different.  Although sometimes touted as a ploy to get people to spend ridiculous amounts of money, I’m just as happy making gifts and spending it watching movies with that special someone.  This V-day I don’t have a significant other, but I will be spending it with someone extra-special to me!  All this talk about love and relationships, got me thinking about the most important relationship in my life, my connection with God and how He shows his love for me. These are some ways that I know my heavenly father loves me (and you).

He provides: In the bible God tells us that He will supply our every need and that I need not worry about what I should eat or wear.  Granted I am a shoeaholic so I do find myself obsessing about these things, but I don’t have to and I know that I shouldn’t!  There have been days where I’m extremely low on funds (I’m talking $1 in my account low) and I’ll get a free lunch or someone will give me money they owe me, once I even received an unexpected check in the mail.  Although I’m not weatlhy by any stretch of the world, I’m rich because I’m blessed to have a heavenly father that provides the necessities of life and then some. (Matthew 6:26, Philippians 4:19)

He protects:  There are many examples in the bible of God protecting the Israelites and from what I know He will do the same thing for us today as His children.  God tells us that He will fight for us and He will even send angels to protect us if need be.  I can remember once when I was stuck on the side of the road, as cars whizzed by I was extremely apprehensive about getting out  but not even two minutes after pulling over a tow truck came to help me. I hadn’t called anyone and didn’t have to worry about a thing, God had me and sent one of His angels to protect me.  (Exodus 14:14, Romans 12:19, Psalm 91:1-16, Psalm 34:7)

He chastises: This one is a hard pill to swallow because who in their right mind likes to be chastised?!  But usually when I do something wrong, tell a lie (I’m not a great liar anyway) or am into something I shouldn’t be, I’m usually paying the consequences fairly quickly!  The bible tells us that God loves those that He chastises because those are His children.  When you were a child and did wrong your parent or guardian would have probably scolded or at least let you know where you went wrong out of concern and love.  Our parents were put here to love us by God so it’s easy to see  how much more does God love us. (Hebrews 12:16, Proverbs 3:12)

He says so: I can remember a time when I didn’t read the bible for myself and believed whatever the priest (I was raised Catholic) or someone else told me about God so I didn’t know my father.  But since reading for myself, Gods love for little old me has becomes more real to me every day (if that makes sense).  It has become an easier concept to take hold of because there was a time when I didn’t even know that I could have an intimate relationship with God as a father or lover of my soul.  To me He had been this great unapproachable being that ruled with an iron fist and I was just trying to get through this life to heaven by being a perfect person that did not wrong, or at least tried to most of the time.  When I did do wrong I would beat myself up worse than either of my parents could punish me.  I didn’t realize that I didn’t have to be perfect for Him to love me because He knew I wasn’t, after all He created made me that way!  Through reading His word I’ve learned so much about the type of relationship God wants with me and what He has done to have that connection with me.  It is still astonishing and sometimes hard for my brain to wrap around the fact that such a great God would deem me special enough to call me daughter.  That to me is a miracle in itself and I thank Him. (Romans 8:35-39, 1John 4:16, Luke 12:7)

He rewards: of course we get the ultimate reward when we get to heaven, but until then the earthly rewards are more than enough.  If we continue to reap we will be rewarded.  There are also times when God wants us to be still and know.  If we listen and submit to God’s will we will see the fruits of listening to our heavenly father. I can remember going through a period of waiting for a job, it was 8 months before I got one.  I went through depression, anger and eventually acceptance.  Although I never stopped submitting job applications, I held on to the fact that what I was going through at the time was God’s will.  I studied my bible, watched shows related to getting to know God and practically nothing else (that may be excessive but it was what I needed at the time).  When I got a job I was so ecstatic because it was just the type of job I had asked for, God always comes through!  (Hebrews 6:10, Galatians 6:9)

He forgives:  God sent His son to die for us, Jesus was the ultimate sacrifice and washed away our sins.  God is quick to forgive us and because He is love and love keeps no records of wrongs, our slates are clean once we repent (confess and turn away from that particular sin completely). Many times we have a hard time forgiving (at least I know I have), but we must as followers of God so that He can forgive us as we do others.  (John 3:16, Romans 5:8)

He never give’s up on us:  I have been a wishy washy Christian for a lot of my years here on earth (I wrote about that here).  But whenever I return to God, He is there.  He is not angry with me, He doesn’t push me away or make me feel bad but He embraces and loves on me.  I don’t know if you’ve ever been in a situation where someone let’s you know that ‘they told you so’ or turns their back on you because they feel like you walked away from them, it’s a horrible feeling especially if all you wanted was acceptance and love.  But human’s make horrible gods obviously, so thank God for our heavenly father who will never leave or forsake you! (Deuteronomy 31:6, James 4:8, Luke 15:1-7)

Also take note that all the ways God shows His love are ways that we can show others love as well.  Have a happy valentines day and love on:)

God bless,
Court

Be grateful for what you DON’T have…

Most of us have been blessed in many ways those we can easily see and some that require a head tilt and a squint to bring the blessing into focus. Things happen that are negative, we struggle, we hurt, we don’t get our way, we get angry with God. Believe me I’ve been there and as a continually evolving spirit I will be again. But after the tears, the tantrums, the outburst and the stormy seas of trauma or heartache have begun to subside its important to remember to thank Him for our trials and tribulations. James wrote to consider it pure joy for trials and tribulation because the testing of your faith produces perseverance and eventually perfection in other words it makes you complete and whole (James 1:2).

When I initially began to read stories like Job and heard about praising God through your pain in church and bible studies all I could think of was why on earth would I be grateful for the things I didn’t want or don’t have? It was crazy to me, but as I grew in Christ I learned that being thankful wasn’t just for the things we deem as good but also for the tiny struggles, the disappointments and hurts, I also began to understand why. It’s at these points in life that we mature as a Christians. God is taking us from that baby bottle to mushy baby food and eventually meat. So why not praise Him? Usually at those times we’re gaining knowledge from life lessons, developing our faith and learning to depend on Him.

God’s word says to give ‘thanks always for ALL things’ (Ephesians 5:20) not just the stuff we want, like that promotion but also for the demotion. Praise Him for not getting that house or job and for the break up you didn’t see coming, you never know what He’s saving you from. Personally, I had to learn to thank God for not being married or having the family I wanted at this time in my life (I go into why a little bit here). I also had to be thankful for the things I went through in my past with men because it educated me, grew me up and now I can pass on what I know for sure to help others.

It may not be easy or something you want to do but it’s an invaluable lesson learning to praise Him through your struggles and pain. As this holiday season rolls around and so many of us gather to be with loved ones find at least one thing you have been wanting and thank Him for not bringing it yet. Think of one thing that hurts your heart and thank Him for the experience. Think of the lessons instead of the loss, focus on the good that has or may come out of a bad situation. Shift your focus to one of Philippians 4:8 point of view. We ALL need encouragement every now and then, so let me remind you that you are blessed beyond measure and He has great things in store for you. Be grateful for eventually being on your journey to completeness and wholeness by thanking Him for what you have and what you don’t!

1 Thessalonians 5:18 – in everything give thanks, for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you

I want to know what you’re thankful for not having this holiday season, comment below!

Here’s to a purposeFULL life!
Court

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My friend Tayo and I on a mission trip in Costa Rica, at the time we were looking at a gigantic spider, but the photo also represents the people living in the tin shanties that surrounded us. They had very little but were still extremely grateful!

Six things you won’t have to do when the right man comes along

Sometimes the things that happened in the bible can read like a modern day reality tv show. I enjoy taking stories from the bible and connecting them to the modern day world and below I highlight six things you won’t have to do for the right man with some biblical examples.

1. You won’t have to manipulate him: let’s just take it from the top with this example and start with Eve (Genesis:3). Technically the serpent or devil manipulated Eve and she in turn got her husband to eat of the fruit. Prior to this incident Adam was just chilling naming animals and going about his business. Granted he had a choice & wasn’t innocent, but he had some trust in Eve as his wife and partook of her offer. Look where that got Eve (and all women to follow) kicked out of paradise, painful childbirth and enmity between women and men!

As humans we can sometimes have a tendency to be manipulative, especially to get our way. But not only is this human characteristic unattractive and not fitting for a Christian, being manipulative will most likely backfire. Manipulation can come in many forms, through conversation, psychological, actions and even the way we dress. Women know that men are visual creatures, so don’t play the role of a temptress if you know he’s trying to live right! Yes, he should be able to control himself, but why try to purposely throw him off? Obtaining the affection of a man based on manipulation will ultimately fail because usually once he finds out, he will eventually recognize your manipulative tactics and take you for being a disengienuine person Tricking someone into being with you or doing what you want isn’t a great way to begin a relationship, but it is a sure fire way to end one!

2. You won’t have to lie about who you are: Lying goes right along with manipulation. Let’s look at the story of Leah (Genesis 29:21-35, Genesis:30). For me the story of Leah is a sad one, not only did her father have lie about who she was to get her married off, no matter what she did or how many sons she bore, Jacob would never love her the way he did Rachel. Although, she got what she wanted (marriage) it was far from a happy union for her.

Now today we aren’t totally hiding our faces from our grooms on the wedding day so he’s totally clueless. But we can still pretend to be someone else, even you choose to lie about little things like enjoying sports when you don’t know a red from a white sock or being deceitful about that meal you ‘cooked’ just for him while the take out boxes sit in the trash. Yes, there are so many worldly things that tell us we have to play this game and possibly tell little white lies to make him fall for you. But guess what, if you’re lying about who you are, he isn’t falling for you, he’s falling for the woman you pretend to be. Then you have to either keep up the charade or come clean about the reality of you, lying will always hurt the relationship in the end. You should feel comfortable and confident being yourself around a person you’re interested in. If you have to lie to keep someone’s interest, is it really worth keeping?

3. You won’t have to chase him: We’ve all heard that women are hunters and men like women who are aggressive in pursuit or she that chase down a husband findeth a good thing, right? No? Me neither. Ask any man, seriously ANY man and he will say he wants to pursue a woman not the other way around. Let’s look at Joseph and Potophers wife (Genesis 39). Potophers wife was all over Joseph the minute he stepped foot in Egypt. She literally chased him down, ripping a piece of his clothing! Nits pretty obvious to most that if you have to do all that to get a man, he don’t want you. It can be difficult waiting patiently for the man God has for you, which in Potophers wife’s case was her husband as is the case for you, God willing, you just haven’t met him yet. If a man really wants something or someone in his life he will go after his desire. We are ladies worth pursuit, so if you have to chase after him most likely he doesn’t want to be caught. Chase after God and if it be His will, the desires of your heart will undoubtedly be fulfilled.

4. You won’t have to abandon your values: This is a tough one for some of us, myself included. As someone that isn’t a virgin and struggles with remaining celebaite until marriage, I recognize that sexual sin can be a beast to conquer requiring much prayer and fleeing from temptation. In addition to sexual sin, there are a ton of other thing you shouldn’t have to bend on with someone worth having in your life including your walk with God, finances and your relationships with friends or family. The woman at the well (John 4) was in the predicament of having five ex-husbands and was in an unholy relationship with what I suppose would have been her boyfriend. After a talk with Jesus, she recognized or accepted the error of her ways and was changed from that day forward. We all need to have regular talks with Jesus through reading His word and not only recognizing but repenting of and correcting our actions when we step outside the value system set in place for us as Christians. I also recommend you decide what your core values are, jot them down, discuss them with your guy and if he can’t or won’t respect your them then you probably need to have a little talk with Jesus!

5. You won’t have to play second fiddle to another woman: This one is pretty much a no brainer for some, but for those that live in a world where being a side chick is all but glorified it remains a gray area. Take a look at the story of Hannah and Peninnah (1 Samuel 1: 1-7). Granted, during this time it was common to have many wives, but Peninnah reminds me of so many women that set out to hurt the other woman, by taunting her or taking pride in their position as the mistress. Peninnah tortured Hannah to the point of depression, but still Elkanah loved Hannah and always gave her more than he did Peninnah. Although she had Elkanah as a husband, she would never truly have his heart, as is the case in many love triangles.

In today’s society being a mistress is touted as an honor on television and in music lyrics, it’s common to accept (and enjoy) playing the role as it becomes more overt. But honestly, if you are dating someone that refuses to make you a priority why keep him around as an option? There’s no better feeling in a relationship than having a man that loves you and only you! Why sell yourself short? There should be nothing to make you accept a role as the other woman especially not money, material possessions, jealousy, lonliness or insecurities. Allowing yourself to be disrespected and used in this way speaks volumes about your own internal confidence.

6. You won’t have to force him to commit: Although I don’t have a specific example of a man not wanting to commit, I will use the story of Michal and David. (2Samuel 3:12-16). Yes, Michal loved David initially, but after years of not hearing from him she had moved on to her second marriage with Pal’ti-el. When David took her back, it was clear that she and Pal’ti-el were not easily parted. She seemed bitter and upset going forward with David, even to the point of scorning him. Usually forced commitments only breed resentment and inevitable unhappiness.

Unfortunately, in today’s world titles seem to be passĂ©. Some men (and women) don’t want to put a label on a relationship and their partners are fine with it. Ultimately, the relationship remains in limbo and allows for easy outs and countless excuses, because hey if you never officially stated you were in a committed monogamous relationship it isn’t technically cheating. I’m not condoning these actions but it is how some people think. Even if a woman is in denial about it, we all know that if he wanted to be with her, he would make it known, not only to the woman but others as well!

Here’s to a PurposeFULL life!
Court

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The Art of Friendship…

Your friends and loved ones are inside the inner most core of your sphere of influence. I have learned that who you associate and surround yourself with is a direct reflection of how you feel about yourself. In other words your friends are truly a reflection of you. Your relationships especially the friends you choose are extremely important in your walk with God. At times they could mean the difference between back sliding and pressing forward towards Him. It is important to choose friends that will uplift, support, encourage and understand your walk with God. If your friends are constantly trying to get you to do things you know are wrong, are always discouraging the things you try to do for the Kingdom or just have a general negative attitude about your journey you may want to consider loving them from a distance. At least until you are stable enough in your walk with Christ to resist the pull of the world. As Christians our goal is to bring people closer to God not have them pull us towards worldly ways. In 1 Corinthians 9:27 Paul says ‘But I keep under my body, and bring it into subjection: lest that by any means, when I have preached to others, I myself should be a castaway’. So it is possible that after all of our attempts to show people the light that we ourselves can be castaway if we do not practice self-control and continually renew our minds and spirits with the word.

In order to have healthy and Godly friendships we have to know how to be a great friend. This is one thing that I try to be purposeful about in my life because I truly value the positive, genuine friendships that God has given me to develop while on earth. Just as in any relationship, communication, listening and speaking life into your friend is so very important. I didn’t always have great friendships and I had to learn how to be a friend to the people God had placed into my life. Growing up I was bullied in school a LOT, I can remember going home crying most days because I was this socially awkward, uber quiet, lanky girl that was the tallest female in my grade (any grade) to top it off I had super short hair that refused to allow a little thing like a comb or brush to tame it. Basically, think of a black Olive Oil with a fro-perm! Unfortunately I never stood up for myself and would allow others to walk over me and speak to me any type of way. I ate their words, literally internalizing them and they manifested in the form of tears, hurt and self hatred. The more I heard that I was ugly, had nappy hair, was a nerd and weirdo the more I believed it. I brought a lot of those feelings about myself into my adult life through insecurities and negative self talk. I didn’t like me, I didn’t know who and whose I was. Yes, bullying can affect people so much that they carry it with them for years! But because of these insecurities and lack of self-love, I didn’t feel worthy of love. I allowed people to surround me that didn’t have my best interest at heart, this included friends and romantic partners. They would call me a friend to my face and talk about me behind my back, steal from me or make fun of me I would laugh with them on the outside but tears filled me internally. My boyfriend at the time claimed to love me, but the relationship was filled with anger and abuse because neither one of us knew how to love, ourselves or each other. Now there were a couple of people that I believed to be true friends and they are still around today, two people to be exact, but some people I truly had to learn to love from afar. I can remember going through an ordeal with one of my then friends where everything came to a head and I had to stop speaking to her. It was difficult because I thought we were best friends. She wasn’t a bad person at all, but not someone that uplifted and encouraged me. Around this time I wrote a letter to God to bring me friends where our relationship would be one of mutual support and genuine sisterly love. And guess what! God has answered my prayers, because that’s just what He does! God has since sent some awesome people my way that I truly love and consider chosen family. I have positive, uplifting and inspiring relationships with them and best of all they push me towards God through conversations, bible studies, invites to spiritual events and much more. This is in part because I learned that in order to have great friends, you have to be a great friend. I had to search my own heart and see where I contributed to my friendships in the past falling apart or why I chose those type of people to have in my circle. I make a conscious effort to check my selfishness at the door, to remember important things going on in my friend’s lives and to make a special effort to reach out and keep in touch. Because I’m human I fail, but when I do I woman up and attempt to make it right. Many times the efforts we have to make are small but there are times our friends will need us most, a big move, an illness or loss of a loved one and we should always try to be there for them. So often when we get boyfriends or husbands we forget about our sister friends that we traveled with while single or life just gets busy and we can forget to cultivate and tend to these relationships. But if we want the sweet fruit of a genuine, supportive, caring relationship we have to put in the work and effort to make it grow and blossom. My girlfriends are my confidents, my sisters in Christ and my truth tellers when I don’t want to hear the truth. I can count the number of people on one hand that I consider true friends and honestly quantity means nothing to me without quality so I’m extremely grateful for the few I have. I thank God for my friends and the things I went through growing up, it made me so much more appreciative of them and without the occurrences in my past I wouldn’t have a story to tell which hopefully will help others master the art of friendship.

Here’s to a purposeFULL life #kingdomfocused
Court

Hebrews 10:24-25 (ESV) And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near.

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One of my good friends and I white water rafting in Costa Rica, I highly recommend it!

Continue reading The Art of Friendship…

Wishy Washy Saints…

Do you ever get to the point in your life where you feel distant from God or that your zeal for studying and reading is waning and you don’t know why? I have and probably will in the future to be honest.

Ideally we are all consistently and progressively growing in the word of God daily. But none of us exist in a utopia and many times we find ourselves waxing and waning in our devotion to spending time with God. I don’t think this means that our love for Him decreases but sometimes our flesh becomes lazy in seeking Him or our world becomes so hectic that we just don’t set aside time to spend with Him. Days without seeking Him can easily turn into weeks and months into years until eventually He is no longer an intricate part of our lives.

I have lived this life of a wishy washy Christian and believe me, it’s painful to look back on your journey that started off so strong and wonder where the time went or why at this point in your life you’re still just a baby in Christ. I don’t pretend to have all the answers but besides remaining active in church or prayer groups, this is what I do in situations like this.

Don’t dwell on time wasted: we have a God that wants a relationship with us, so many times you can pick up where you left off. You’ll be surprised how much you remember even if years have gone by.

Read anyway: this is one of the best things you can do! Even if I don’t feel like reading the bible, I’ll still pick it up and get to studying. Many times I get so wrapped up in the reading that I don’t want to stop.

Don’t wait until it’s late: try to study when you’re still wide awake and not tired. Many people wake early to pray and study, I try but I identify with all the non-morning people out there & realize this can sometimes be difficult.

Turn on worship music: there’s something about music that sets the mood and puts me in a mindset of wanting to draw closer to God. Sometimes I’ll just sing to God on my own and although I can’t carry a note I’m sure He still likes it!

Use notecards or a devotional: If I don’t have a lot of time I use notecards that are a quick study until I can set aside more time.

Pray: talk to God tell Him how you are feeling and ask for the consistency, zeal & time to you wish to dedicate to Him.

Eliminate distractions: some distractions aren’t easily eliminated like kids or a partner, but turning off the television, getting off Facebook or turning off your phone are all thing you can easily control.

Practice self control: put yourself on a schedule and stick to it as much as possible, but don’t beat yourself up when you don’t.

In Isaiah 53:6 it says – “all we like sheep have gone astray; we have turned everyone to his own way; And The Lord hath laid on him the iniquity of us all.” He is speaking of Jesus taking on our sins even in the case of the people turning away from God. Even if you pull or turn away He is always there, waiting to usher you into His loving arms and for you to draw near so that He may draw near to you (James 4:8).

Here’s to a purposeFULL life!
Court

Psalm 119:105 your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path

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Ways to prevent falling for a wolf…

Although nothing is fail proof, here are some things we can do to combat tying ourselves to the wrong person?
1. Get Godly counsel about him: If you are serious, introduce him to your pastor and other members at your church. What do they say and think of him? If he attends a church visit his church as well.
2. Get to know the people in his life: How does he interact with them? What do they have to say about him? The more you all are together around others, the more comfortable he will become showing his true colors if initially only his representative was showing up.
3. Be observant : Is he a man of his word? Does he do the things he says he will or does he say one thing and then do another?
4. Seek God: Ask God for discernment and wisdom, which God gives freely to those that ask (James 1:5). Seek to know his heart more than what you see physically as his outward appearance (1 Samuel 16:7 & Romans 8:27) and ask God to show you if the relationship is within His will.
5. Have him meet people that love you: Spend time with people you know and love together. Ask people whose opinions you trust and that truly have your best interest at heart. Although they should not be the final or ultimate decision makers you should definitely take their thoughts into account especially if they have had the opportunity to spend a lot of time with him.
6. Trust your intuition: Intuition is one of the ways God directs us, it is that small nudge we get from time to time when you just know something isn’t right or when you should continue on your current path.
I hope these pointers help, happy courting!

Court

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Unequally Yoked – Part 2: My story

I can remember going out on a few dates with this guy that was tall, dark and F-I-N-E! He seemed to have his life together financially, had two cars a house and he loved animals as much as I did. We had a bunch of things in common, our love of travel, adventure sports and skating to say the least. When we were out people would compliment us and tell us we made a cute couple and every time I would go out with him I would wonder if this could be it, could he be the one! But let’s pump the brakes here, because two things did bother me about him: 1. He drank a lot in my view and 2. Although he was Christian he had no desire to grow in his walk with God. I would say things to myself like well, I have to accept people where they are and you never know sometime in the future his desire to know God may begin to grow. But no matter how much I tried to rationalize it, I knew that we were not equally yoked at this point in time of life. I wanted someone that was crazy about God, recognized His importance in their lives and would passionately pursue Him.
The night he asked me if I wanted to take our relationship further and become exclusive, I had visions of us going to church together, praying and studying together, but in real life he didn’t even want to attend bible study with me! This ladies, is where we sometimes allow ourselves to view things the way we want them as opposed to as they really are or think we can by some magical power change this man into who we want. It isn’t fair to him and it rarely works out for us! But there I was, about to delve into another relationship that I knew would leave me unfulfilled, unhappy and once again able to claim the not so prestigious perpetual girlfriend title. I knew in my heart that our relationship would look great from the outside but on the inside I would never be satisfied. My cousin that had met and liked him thought I was crazy when I stated that I wouldn’t keep seeing him in that capacity. Although he was raised in a religious house hold he wasn’t concerned with growing closer to God at this time and that would always be a problem from me. If I became yoked with him there was the possibility of me moving further and further away from Christ and my goal was just the opposite. Now it is possible that I could have drawn him closer to God, which would be the best scenario, but am I going to bet my future on the possibility of something happening that he didn’t desire at the time? And I say my future because I do not date just to date, I date with the purpose and intention of marriage.
In the end, we still text every now and then to catch up, but I know nothing more will come of our relationship at least right now and I’m fine with that because I know that I want a husband that will push me closer to Christ. This is in no way an insult to him, because we all move closer to God in our own timing. But I would like to date and eventually marry a man that knows what it means to be the godly leader of a house hold and practices the biblical principles of a marriage. Someone that I won’t have to fight off every two seconds because they don’t understand the impact of fornication or moving outside of God’s will (1 Corinthians 6:18-20). A man that will be able to minister to our family and wash me with the word of God. (Ephesians 5:25-27 & 1 Corinthians 13:4-7). It will be impossible for him to do that if he doesn’t know God or have that desire for relationship with Him. Sometimes even when we don’t want to, we just have to keep it moving and know that as long as we walk with God, He will illuminate our paths as we do (Psalm 119:105).
Scriptures: 2 Corinthians 6:14 – Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?
Here’s to a purposeFULL life!
Court

Enough Reality (why I ditched reality tv)…

My girlfriend looked at me like I had two heads the day I told her I stopped watching Real Housewives of Atlanta. ‘What is wrong with you?’ She asked deeply concerned almost as if I had just announced I had an incurable illness. “Nothing, it just got to be too much for me” I shrugged and went on to briefly explain the reasons I had ditched reality tv. Now, I must confess, I was a reality television addict! From the Kardashians to any real housewife from any state, I watched them all. Most nights I was plopped in front of the television and if not you better believe my DVR was set to capture all the action. Seeing the fights and arguments then dishing about them on Facebook or the phone with friends that shared my love of drama was a highlight of my evening. I knew I used television as a way of escaping the monotony of my own life. It provided a false sense of excitement that was lacking in my own everyday. I also knew I had to stop using tv as a crutch, so about three years ago I stopped cold turkey. At that point in my life I was going through a difficult time, I had lost my job and had to move back in with my father. Getting lost in reality tv made me forget that I felt like a failure in life if even for a brief moment. I had two degrees and somehow still found myself curled up on a couch night after night. Although I was grateful to have a place to lay my head, it was a devastating blow to my ego.

Honesty, I can’t tell you exactly what happened or what switched but one day I just didn’t have the desire, I couldn’t stomach the arguments and it was sickening to see grown women (and men) act like a bunch of catty schoolgirls for ratings. This is no dis to anyone who watches this type of programming, but I personally had had enough. It was at this time that I started watching more Christian centered shows, I watched a lot of Daystar and other stations geared toward spirituality. Also, since I wasn’t working it gave me plenty of time to delve deeper into my in my bible study and relationship with God. I learned a lot about how what you see and hear affects your inner spirit. In Psalms, David states that he would set no wicked thing before his eyes (Psalms 101:3). I’m not saying the women on these shows are wicked, because who am I to judge their hearts? But I will say that some of their actions are not those that I would want to take in on a consistent basis. And they definitely aren’t anything I would emulate, although I must admit I did and probably still will have my moments as God makes progress with me. But for audiences that are easily tricked into thinking that the eye rolling, popping off at the mouth, tell it like it is no matter who they hurt women they see on television are people to fashion your life after, I would challenge them to read Proverbs 31 and Titus 2:5, portraits of biblical women.

In proverbs 21:19 (NIV), it says it is better to dwell in the wilderness than to live with a quarrelsome and nagging wife, seriously the wilderness ya’ll! I don’t know about you, but I don’t have time to waste watching argumentative women, I value my girlfriends and if they acted that way I would definitely have to love them from a distance! There is nothing that I can learn or gather from those shows except how to be quarrelsome and that is the opposite of what I want to become so anything not within the focus of where I’m headed had to go. I truly believe that just as you should guard your heart, your eyes and ears should be guarded as well especially since the eye is the light of the body (Matth 6:22). If we are truly living to keep our bodies healthy we must also include that which we hear and see because it truly does affect us. Although I do listen to secular music I try to draw the line at lascivious music. Music can definitely affect our moods, it can help put us in a state of worship or a state of lust. Here is a link to a research article in science daily that discusses music and mood changes. Simply put, everything we do is about choices and in most situations we can choose what we put into our bodies. Will it be something that helps us grow or keeps us stagnant, the choice is always ours.
Philippians 4:8
Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.
Here’s to a purposeFULL life
Court

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