In relationships I’ve made many mistakes, but there has also been plenty of right choices thrown in with the wrongs. It’s been on my mind to share some of the little ways I’ve learned to make a man feel special. I compiled this list from things that I’ve done or haven’t done and wished I did! Sometimes it’s the little things that count the most and these are all pretty simple to do (for the most part). I’m speaking solely from a romantic partnership perspective, but most of these can work in any type of relationship.
1. Say it with a note: Leave little notes from time to time in his pillow or in his lunch bag just to remind him of how special he is to you. This is something I love doing with a significant other because I know finding a little ‘I love you’ note or appreciation message every now and then would make me feel awesome!
2. Send an impromptu message: Send a short text, email or Facebook message just to let him know you’re thinking of him or praying for him throughout the day.
3. Congratulate him on big goals. Flip the script and treat him to dinner or send a token when he’s accomplished a goal he set out to achieve.
4. Be there to listen: even if he doesn’t want to talk, embrace and love on him especially if he’s had a rough day.
5. Greet him with a smile: After years of being together the butterflies may have fluttered away, but it’s still important to greet him with a smile and some enthusiasm at his arrival. It’s easy to get lax, I know because I’ve done so in the past, but it will only make him happy to see you in return.
4. Listen for cues: know what he is loves doing or is needing and try to surprise him with it. Is his birthday coming up and he loves basketball? Surprise him with tickets for the game or just cook all his favorites. Does he need a purple tie, pick one up the next time you’re out. Either way he’ll feel special knowing you listened and took the time to get to know his desires.
5. Step into his world: watch a game or two with him even if you aren’t into sports like myself. But if it’s something he enjoys make some time to sit with him through at least some of it. Or if video games are his thing play with him every once and a while.
6. Don’t nag: okay I’ll be honest, this is one I struggle with immensely. Sometimes I get tired of hearing myself and have to make a conscious effort to shut up and take a sea! It can be extremely difficult to have the self control to say things once and see how it plays out but in the long run it’s usually worth it and saves on added frustrations possibly arguments.
7. Pray for and with him: one of the times I feel loved most is when someone takes the time to intercede on my behalf. Although often times this happens in my prayer closet if I’m dating someone and we do pray together I’ll make sure to include them.
8. Be supportive: share in his efforts to help him accomplish goals and dreams in life. Hand out fliers, promote his business on Facebook, tell others about his endeavors and speak on his behalf when he’s not there.
9. Encourage him: I speak a little bit more about being an encourager here, but make sure to build him up and speak life into his spirit! It’s something that can so easily give way to tearing him down when we focus on the negatives or down men as a whole, these things only breed resentment, hurt and anger. If this is an issue for you as it has been for me, I’d recommend reading Proverbs 14:1 and commiting it to memory for times when you struggle!
10. Grace him: People are human, so of course he’s going to do somethings you don’t like because no one is perfect. In moments where we may want to go off or berate him, think about how it might affect him and your relationship in the long run before saying something mean or hurtful. If he is willing to listen and take ownership of his faults there is always a way to speak the truth in love.
11. Serve him: if you’re married or cohabitating, you can do small things like draw him a bath after a long day at work, plan a romantic evening, bring him breakfast in bed every once and a while or get his car washed. Since Jesus calls us to be servants what better place to start than in our own homes.